What do you know? Another 6 years have passed, and so much more has happened.
Today's post is an attempt to capture something I was thinking about yesterday.
I have 2 modes that my brain operates in (maybe more, but these 2 are what I thought about yesterday).
1. Analytical mode. In this mode, I see connections, patterns, inconsistencies, and how everything is put together. This is a good mode for evaluating essays and going over reports. Also good for generating reports and making sense of data, and for making broad plans and policies.
2. Operational mode. In this mode, I am focused on what needs to be done next in the plan to reach a particular end goal. Mostly, this means I am focused on the next step rather than the overall picture, as I assume that the bigger picture will take care of itself if I just take the next step as it comes. This is how I get through my tasks on a day to day basis.
I have realised that I can operate in either mode but not both at the same time. When in operational mode, my brain does not (cannot?) look at the bigger picture as it is hyperfocused on the next step. When in analytical mode, my brain dismisses operational details as unimportant as they do not materially impact the overall patterns and connections in the bigger plan.
Perhaps the best leaders have the ability to quickly transition from one to the other, or to work in both modes at the same time. I can't do that, yet. And every time I switch from one mode to the other, some switching cost is involved and it is a (literally!) physical effort to reroute my brain from the operational lines to the analytical lines and vice versa.
Because these 2 modes are mutually exclusive for me, the resulting impact on my behaviour at work in different roles is likely to look like this :
a. I am a worker on a team. This puts me in operational mode. Therefore, I focus on the next step in the process. Where there is an explicit instruction to do a task, I do it. Where there isn't, I check against the stated plan, and if there is nothing else, I stop until my next scheduled step, since it is not for me to second-guess what the bosses want.
And this means that I will not show any particular initiative because to do that I need to be in analytical mode, but my role requires me to be in operational mode. So you won't see any typical leadership-type activity from me.
b. I am a leader of a team. This puts me in analytical mode. Therefore, I look at where the team is going and whether or not things are on track to get there. I don't sweat the details, because I trust the team to do whatever it takes to get their job done. This means that sometimes things happen that I don't know the details to, and when asked I don't really have an answer. As I type this I realise that I could get reports, and question the team on the assumptions and thinking behind the actions, to check that the reasoning is sound (and therefore things will go as planned). I also realise that what takes me away from these discussions is that I am often caught in operational mode as there are other operational tasks at hand, and so my analytical mode is not fully engaged and I don't always ask the right questions.
So this is really me thinking through how I operate, and what the impact has been on my work and life. If you're reading this, and it resonates, well, good to know you're not alone, and if it doesn't, maybe it will help you understand some of your friends and colleagues who just can't seem to do what you expect of them.
Also I want to express my gratitude to all the people I've worked with, who have stepped up to help me out time and again over the years, and put up with all my failings. I hope I have in some way reciprocated, and to have the chance to do so in future if I haven't.
