Wednesday, February 22, 2006

A Worry-Free Life

In a very belated attempt to find a resolution for the year (so typical of me - always late for everything), I have dug up an old theme which has manifested itself in various forms over the years.

Sometimes I have called it a Simple Life (no relation to the TV show), at other times it has been a Quiet Life, but I believe a Worry-Free Life best describes it.

Let me define Worry before too many brickbats get thrown. To me, Worry is thinking about the bad stuff that might happen, not doing anything about it, and continuing to think about the bad stuff.

For me, bad stuff ought to be thought about, but just once, to see if anything can be done. If yes, then do it. If not, or if what can be done requires too much sacrifice (as in more than what I would lose to the bad stuff), then prepare to minimise its effects and take it when it comes. In the former case, once action is taken, no need to worry - what can be done has been done. In the latter case, same thing. And it's a matter of whether you can say in good conscience that you have tried your best. No last scenes from Schindler's List (where Oscar Schindler laments that if he had sold his car, he could have saved a few more [Jews]) for me. I've done what I could, or thought I could at the time, and I will take whatever comes as a result.

So, as the song goes, don't worry, be happy.

What are the things people worry about? Money, social status, job satisfaction, relationships, family. I've left out things like job security and providing for the family because they all go back to money.

Money - I've got enough to spend. I know what I would spend on if I got more money (a theatre company), but it would take a lot of money and it's not so important to me that I devote my life to getting it. Besides, there are corporate sponsors for that sort of thing. As for spending on potential others - I'll take on extra work if I need to, but that's not something to worry about now.

Social status - Reclusive ol' me? Ha. I'm happy with the small circle of friends I have. And even then they might complain I don't talk to them much. Heck, I don't even blog that often. Besides, if I really wanted to I could go back to teaching and get the adulation of youngsters who don't know any better, but that's not what I signed up for.

Job satisfaction - Starting to get some variety in job satisfaction, but still hungry for a wider range of experience. Still, I seem to be headed in the right direction overall. I just hope I can overcome the prejudice against older people when I eventually move on. If not, there's always teaching :P

Relationships - Not too successful so far, but not worried either, especially since an ego-boosting incident while being Chief Presiding Examiner last year. As someone commented, "Got house got car where got scared no girlfriend?" We're all shallow like that (me included). Only question is whether I'm willing to let someone get so close to me again.

Family - For those in the know, my mom's situation is advancing slowly. The doctor says it's normal, and that it's quite a good (slow) pace so far. The interesting thing was that his first question to my mom (after "how are you?") was "Are you happy?" which for me is the most important thing right now (for her). And I think she is. She'd better be, with what the rest of the family's doing to keep everyone's spirits up. And dad's finally playing golf again and he's much better for it so nothing to worry about there either.

In summary, nothing to worry about. All accounted for. And that's the way my life will be. And I'll be damned if I let anyone take that away from me.

OK enough about my personal report. Will gripe about my people and my country when I can be bothered with them again. Which I expect will be soon since elections should be just round the corner.

And someday I will look back on all this and smile. (I'd laugh but my false teeth would fall out).

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